Monthly Archives: February 2024


I’ve spent much of my life waiting for my ship to come in.  I don’t mean a boatload of treasures.  Today I was thinking about so many wonderful things I have owned in my life, and let slip through my fingers.  Maybe I didn’t realize the value of some of the possessions… cars in particular.  But we can’t keep everything.  I’ve owned four houses, and have filled them with things.  I couldn’t move it all.  No, the ship I’ve been waiting for is contentment.  Peace, maybe.  But these are feelings, and change often.  So I will enjoy them as they come.  All the objects are temporary, as well.  They can enhance our experience in these physical bodies, which are objects.  I think our ship comes in to carry us away when we’re ready to leave even our body behind.  It’s only natural.  Until that ship comes in, I’ll enjoy the physical environment I’ve built around me.  This space I’ve assembled is conducive to creativity. In my fortress, I’m safe to think and express. 


Pretty much my whole life, I have felt that I was not smart.  I believed I couldn’t do math, but then when push came to shove, I aced a math aptitude test and went on to get A’s in nursing school.  I graduated with honors.  

I believed I was a behavior problem in school.  Yes, according to my report card, I was talkative in 4th grade.  I’ve always been talkative.  I don’t see talkative as a bad thing.  My mom saved all my report cards, and I got them back after she died.  Most of them have congratulations slips attached to them because of how well I did.  How did I not know this?

I’ve written about this before.  I’m reiterating it so I have something to attach a few images to.

Not perfect, but definitely not stupid.

There is such a disconnect here for me.  I’m trying to nurture my inner child, and I will continue to advocate for him.  I do the same for my kids and grandkids.